One of the constant struggles of parenting teens is discipline. Most parents find it challenging to discipline their children, especially when it comes to giving out punishments to their defiant teens. Oftentimes, parents resort to only scaring their children with punishments, but never actually get to implementing them.
The use of scare tactics is a trap that most parents fall into. For one, they never work and can even backfire. Well, maybe they could work once, but when your teens see through your strategy, they will never believe you again. Gaining credibility with your teen will be even more difficult.
Parent credibility is an important aspect of disciplining defiant teens, and here are some tips to help you establish that credibility with your teens:
- Consider how the punishment could possibly damage your relationship with your teen.
- Never punish when you are angry as it might lead to unnecessary actions you would regret later.
- Never threaten with a penalty you are not prepared to carry out.
- Implement short-term consequences that last for several hours to a few days for major offenses. Long-term punishments will only encourage more negative behavior as the teen might start to think there might not be anything worse than what he is already getting.
- Punish only the guilty party; do not involve innocent family members.
- Do not use guilt as a means of discipline. It will only breed resentment and ill feelings.
- Help youngsters (not only teens) learn from their mistakes.
- Be consistent. Your teen will know that you keep your word and they can actually believe what you say.
- When you say “NO,” be sure to mean it. Do not give in to pressure when your teen continues to nag or pester you into saying yes.
Effective discipline should include loving follow through as well as teaching children the right thing to do. Being just as credible with rewards as with punishments can help build stronger relationships between parents and their teens.
